Why Should I Worry

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo stood in the alley, taking the last hit off his cigerette. He had just watched Izaya casually walk off. There was no real chase, no cheep thrill, just a nod in his direction and nothing. Even after he charged after him. At least he thought it was a new game that Izaya was playing, but it turned out to be that Izaya just... didn't care if he got hit in the head today.

He reached out and smothered the bud into the brick wall and sighed as he walked down the alley. Once he was out, he tossed the waste into the proper place and looked around.

It seemed he had the need to know what was going on with him. Which was just down right silly. When did he start caring? Well, if anything happened to Izaya... his daily exercise would vanish. He wasn't a fan of that idea. He shook his head then started down the street.

At first, he thought maybe just going to talk to Celty about it so Shinra can freak out about him caring, then he decided that was a bad idea. He was trying to think of someone that was close to Izaya that he could get information from. There was that black haired boy with the girl with the glasses. But were either of them close to Izaya? He stopped and thought about it then shook his head as he started to walk down the street some more. There was that one woman... long hair. He laughed, from what he heard about her, she'd tell him good and wish Izaya to rot in hell.

Shizuo narrowed his eyes as he saw a van drive by, “Maybe Kyohei, maybe not.” He said as he walked past the van with guys getting out wearing yellow scarves.

It took him a moment, “That... blond haired, white hoodie wearing kid,” he said softly. He knew that the kid had a past with Izaya and that... one other girl. So, maybe he'd start there. Now he had no clue where to find him or how to reach him at all.

[Deleted]

Aforementioned blond kid with the white hoodie was chattering amongst some of the old Yellow scarves he had somehow carefully located and asked to return under his rule permanently. He didn't give any rhyme or reason outside of "the Blue Squares have gone too far," which they have, and that was enough for all of them. He didn't need to tell them that he had potentially lost his oldest and closest friend to the shadows of the city and, without hesitation, he was jumping in to get that friend back into the light again.

Suddenly, he noticed his friends scattering in different directions. At first, he was concerned as he watched the strongest man in Ikebukuro walk over, facial expression hidden by those blue tinted glasses he typically wore.

His first instinct was to stiffen up, to not run, to grab a weapon and prepare to fight, but he already knew that he had no chance if Shizuo got mad. So, as the blond walked over, he tilted his head and looked at him.

"Heiwajima Shizuo?"

[tossingtrashcans]

There he was, surrounded by some of his usual punks. He mentally sighed, almost glad that Kasuka left to be a star, he’d never have to worry about finding his brother beaten in an alley for wearing the wrong color in the wrong part of town.

As he walked closer to the kid he watched at the punks ducked out and left in a hurry. He was used to this kind of reaction from people. The fact that this kid didn’t duck out or grab something to fight him with meant something to him. Shizuo looked up and nodded to him,

“You’re close to Izaya right?” He asked looking at him, hands shoved in his pockets, blinking behind the glasses he wore as he looked down at the blonde boy.

If only he could remember what this kid’s name was. He was sure it’d come to him by some point during the conversation. Or like normal, someone else would say it and that would save him a load of trouble.

[Deleted]

The fact that Shizuo was not glaring was the first thing that Kida recognized. That was a good sign and sent the boy off his guard, his steeled defense disappearing as Shizuo nodded in greeting.

When he spoke, Kida offered him a friendly smile. "I wouldn't exactly say it like that, I mean my girlfriend is half-obsessed with him and I have the same amount of issues with my boss as any other person would on top of that. Though yeah, I guess you can say I'm pretty close to him, since I talk to him daily and am over out his place at least twice a week. Why? What's up?"

It wasn't like it was a well kept secret that Izaya and Shizuo did not get along and fought like cats and dogs, despite his boss's obvious crush that danced between infatuation and obsession with the ex bartender. He thought a minute, though. "I guess this is the first time we officially get to meet, right? I'm Kida Masaomi. I work for that guy."

Did it ever honestly, truly hurt anybody to be polite? He couldn't think of any situation outside of being a cute schoolgirl in front of Nasujima-sensei, but he was pretty sure the man fled town long before. However, nothing about Shizuo struck Kida as someone rude, even if he had...issues. Anger issues. Like throwing heavy objects.

Seemed like as good a reason as any to actually be nice until after he proved himself to be hostile. When he stopped being reasonable, Kida would stop being nice.

And run like hell, to be honest.

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo had his mouth open and was ready to talk then Kida started to talk again. He snapped his jaw shut and nodded to him. “Nice to actually meet you Kida.” He said in a rather calm and casual manner. “You clearly know who I am.” Who was he kidding, everyone did. Saved himself that step when he talked to people. Though, the chances of him remember this kid... crap. He mentally sighed as he thought. Kinda minus the N is Kida. Ah! Kida, he doubted he'd remember Kida's name after this conversation.

“Well, you are the closest person I know to him without talking to the rat himself.” Shizuo said then padded his vest then his pockets and pulled out his smokes. He shook the pack then pulled out a smoke with his lips before he pocketed them and pulled out the lighted. Once it was light, the lighter was put away and he took a long drag. After removing it from his mouth he exhaled away from Kida and sighed. He couldn't believe he was doing this.

“Look you free for a little bit. I need to talk to you.” he said as he raised the cigarette back up and stuck it in his mouth, letting it hang there as he inhaled then exhaled softly. “Just know that if you agree, what we talk about... stays between just us.” He added a bit firmly.

[Deleted]

Kida weighed his options, looking over in the direction some of his stragglers had gone into. He could follow Shizuo and risk being beaten to death, or make a powerful ally in life. Either or. Nothing in between, if he was getting what he wanted.

"Yeah, sure, I'm free right now," Kida finally said after a few seconds of apparent contemplation. "What's going on?"

There was nothing too dangerous about following Shizuo into a more private place. Whatever was bothering him was to stay between them, after all. Shizuo had made that well aware. It would only end badly if he didn't follow.

While he didn't know where he was going or why he was even being trusted to follow, much less why the strongest man in Ikebukuro would even bother with him, but life was so full of things that needed no explanation. He wasn't too afraid of a man who was not going to openly threaten him yet. After all, he's decided he wasn't going to run away from any trouble that he got into anymore.

If you view something as a flaw, you fix it.

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo looked around then nodded. “I'll treat ya to dinner, we can talk in the back room to Russia sushi.” He said shoving his hands into his pockets then nodded down the street. They weren't more then a five minute walk from the place.

Without a okay from Kida he headed down the street. Just assuming the blond was going to follow him. After all he kind of didn't give him much of a choice.

It wasn't long into the walk that he pulled out his smokes and light up. The over all the walk was silent, which was good. He was okay with that. He finished the smoke just before he waved to Simon and headed into the place. He talked to the guy behind the counter then waved to Kida and walked back. In the back they could sit and be seen, but not heard. At least not very well anyway.

Shizuo took a seat then waited for Kida to join him.

[Deleted]

Kida followed suit in waving to Simon as they entered, following Shizuo to the same spot that he had sat with Kadota and the group just a few months earlier. It was surprising how different things could be in just a handful of months.

He watched Shizuo sit down, mind clearly on whatever it was that he wanted to talk about, and Kida thought a minute before sitting right across from him. Briefly, he went over the menu. He already figured out that he wanted unagi with a cold black tea, but it may be best to keep looking, if only out of etiquette.

"So, Heiwajima-san, is there something up?" He finally asked, looking a bit embarrassed. If someone didn't already know them, it would almost look like something it wasn't, and to everyone who did know them, this was just a disaster waiting to happen.

But Kida wasn't leaving. Shizuo was nice enough to treat him, so he would return the favor by being nice and not running off like everyone else.

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo glance over the menu then waved someone over and placed his order then turned to look at Kida, “And add whatever he gets to my check.” He said then handed the woman a menu and moved around to get comfortable.

Once Kida told her what he wanted she watched her leave. He said nothing. Shizuo waited till they were served their drinks before he reached out and slid the screen closed. He looked up at Kida.

“Yea I can't believe I am even going to ask this” He started, “Is Izaya okay? He doesn't seem to be his end of the earth torture all the souls self.” He said, “He even... just the other day, saw me running at him and just waved and walked off. That's... not normally for him and I.” He said and shifted back looking to Kida.

Why was he so worried? He had no reason to actually be worried, what did it matter to him? He sighed a little then picked up his milk and took a drink.

[Deleted]

Kida sipped his tea, watching Shizuo do the same with his milk. Milk? At his age? He wasn't about to even try figuring that out. He was trying to figure out what exactly he should tell Shizuo, Izaya's mortal enemy, about Izaya seemingly sudden change in his behavior.

What could he say, anyway? That Izaya's world is crumbling down around him? That's what it looks like to him, at least, and somehow Izaya would just drop into an abyss deeper than the shadows have ever been, with no intention of at least grabbing on to the edge like Kida had once done long ago.

How did he say this? Izaya might have been an outright douchebag, but over the time of working with him, Kida had, admittedly, seen a different side of him.

A protective side. A side that sat him down and told him exactly how it is. A side that made up for the cold hard truth with a children's show. A side that no matter how protective he is, would push away everyone, a side that already knew the end of the story.

And that side of him, hatred be damned, deserved to be noted.

"...I think he's close to the edge, if you get what I'm saying," Kida said, hoping he wasn't being too cryptic.

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo leaned back and slid the door then yelled out and nodded before he closed the screen and sat there, looking at Kida as he looked at him. Watching him think about things, wondering why it was taking him so long to reply to something that he just assumed was going to be a easy answer. Turns out, it wasn’t.

“Close to the edge.” he repeated from him and nodded, “I get it, I just don’t get why. Isn’t he like this high and mighty king toying with the members of his court and town? He’s like a scientist watching over lab rats as they skitter through a maze looking for the single piece of cheese.” He said with a sigh as he looked at Kida.

“So, his world is falling down around him and there is nothing he can do about it. Doesn’t he know… he brought it on himself? All this shit that he’s done to other people, to me.” He said getting a little angry. He snapped his jaw shut and sat there trying to force himself to regain his cool, “It’s his own fault.” He muttered then looked up at the screen door opened and the waitress set down their food.

Shizuo got a sushi sampler plate, two pieces of this and that. They were also served miso soup, which Shizuo decided to eat first, no sense in it getting cold when sushi is already cold.

[Deleted]

There was something akin to relief that flooding his senses as Shizuo figured out what he wasn't saying out loud. He figured that Shizuo had to be at least a bit smarter than Izaya made him out of be, bitterly saying as Kida tried to figure out what Izaya was once again not telling him every time he said "he's such an oaf," or "he's so stupid," and the occasional "If he'd only have listened to me..." that tended to get Kida to roll his eyes.

The truth was, rather Izaya realized it or not, was that he was in love with Shizuo so much that it hurt him. Kida didn't need to be an overpaid psychologist to pick up on that. Maybe the informant finally realized it and that was the one final push that he needed to fall into the abyss.

"Of course Izaya brought it on himself." Kida had no problem with not sticking up for Izaya on that one. "...but, you know, he isn't entirely bad. Whether he wants to believe it or not, he's still a human, you know. There's still a breaking point. There will always be the breaking point. It's just a lot harder to reach his than most people." Kida shrugged. "With a lot of recent events, he isn't himself anymore. Everyone at the 'office' knows that and I think Namie is sitting back and taking wagers on how and when he will finally break." Pause. "I'm on 'within the year from realizing he's only human after all.'"

[tossingtrashcans]

Shizuo ate his soup and nodded, “Well if he goes off and does himself in… it will make my life rather boring.” He said as she sat there eating. It was all he had to say about him now. Izaya made his bed and now he was being forced to sleep in it… alone. Shizuo had always figured something like this might happen. He never thought that Izaya would end up a stranger to his owe friends this soon. Though, if this is what was happening, then that was how it was. There was nothing Shizuo could do for the man.

He finished his soup off then set the bowl aside, picking up his glass and taking a long drink before he started in on his sushi. Thoughts still mulling over in his head, “

“I have… a thought. Something that might help.” He said looking up to Kida, “Would you be willing to help me?” He asked. “Course, you could take full credit for it, I would never want Izaya to know that I cared. He’d never let me live that one down.” He said with a small sigh as he popped another piece into his mouth.

[Deleted]

The younger blond chewed his sushi quietly, contemplating. There were many ways that this could be good, and there were many ways this could be bad.

He licked his fingers of the teriyaki sauce, thinking. "Ne, you love Izaya, don't you?"

It felt completely random, but there was something about the man that spoke to him. Kida was not ever afraid to ask questions, not anymore, not after what happened last year and the mess that Mikado had gotten himself into. Mikado...that was why he was here in the first place. That was why he was reforming the Scarves. His best and closest friend slipped through his fingers like sand. He didn't have time for this. Izaya would either fall or he will pull himself out of it on his own.

...but if Shizuo's answer was yes, then Kida couldn't refuse. He knew the pain of someone being loved and then coming across the only thing that can take that away.

He didn't wait for an answer to his question. "It's alright, I'm on board either way, I just wanna know."

[tossingtrashcans]

“There is no way anyone could love him.” Shizuo said as he sat there, his eyebrow twitching a bit. Kida was lucky he didn’t flip the table and punch him in the face for such a remark.

“We can plan a get together or something, make him feel needed. Of course I won’t be there, you will be as well as whomever else you see fit to invite.” Shizuo said reaching out and picking up another piece of sushi and popping it into the sauce then into his mouth.

He chewed then swallowed before he picked up his glass, looking to the blond boy again. “Just a stupid… meal to make him feel special, last thing I need if for him to jump off a bridge and ruin my source of exercise.” He said, “So I plan it, you get credit and he lives for a little longer.” He shrugged then brought the glass up and took a drink from it before he set it down.